Some months ago, my Honey posted that she and I were different. You should go read the post. I’ll wait.

Ok, thanks for clicking back.

The deodorant in question, in case you would like to avoid it, was Secret Ocean Breeze Platinum Invisible Solid. The purchase was my fault. I have this theory that I like the way things that are colored blue smell. It often works. The Body Shoppe’s Oceanus body wash smells like my whole life should. Actually, I take that back, Honey just after washing with it smells like that.

Anyway…I was at a conference a couple of weeks ago. While packing to go to it, I discovered that we did not have an extra toothpaste. So, when I arrived at my destination, I went to the local grocery store to procure it. Since we were low at home, I thought I’d just get one we’d both like and we could simply transition to it once we were done with the bottle I had not taken from Honey to travel.

Honey and I, while often disparate in tastes in many areas, share a toothpaste preference. We like cinnamon flavor and tend to prefer Crest to the other brands. Therefore I was pleased to discover a new Crest product on sale.

It’s called Crest Pro Health. I brushed like a good girl during my trip. The whole time I was deeply disturbed by the flavor of the toothpaste. Deeply disturbed. I read the packaging, and Crest is very proud of this new product. Here’s what they say on their web site:

“Crest Pro-Health Toothpaste is the first toothpaste recognized by the American Dental Association to protect against all these areas: Cavities, Gingivitis, Plaque, Tooth Sensitivity, Tartar Buildup and Stains, and it Freshens Breath!”

Uh-huh.

The trip in question was just an overnight, so I had two brush opportunities. When I arrived home, I blissfully moved back to our regular toothpaste. Well, regular toothpaste ran out day before last. And we switched. And I remembered how bad things had been. Honey hated the new toothpaste, too.

Scout: Where’s the new toothpaste?

Sporks: It’s in the travel bag.

Scout: Wow, the packaging is different!

Sporks: It’s a new product! Promotes all-around dental health.

Scout: Ok, I’ll give it a try. We sound like a commercial. (brushing) Hmm, It doesn’t taste good. It finished ok, though.

(Next morning)

Scout: I really hate it.

Sporks: So do I.

Scout: We don’t sound like a commercial any more.

Sporks: No indeed.

This morning, when I went into the bathroom to brush, an old, mostly-empty, semi-crusty tube of Aqua-Fresh had been found. I expressed my gratitude. Honey assented and then cheered as I threw the nearly full tube of Pro Health away.

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